‘Twas the Night Before Christmas…in our shop (a parody)

Read our attempt at a humorous re-telling of a Christmas classic below, and remember – just like St. Nick, you too can get inside our shop…by watching this video!

‘Twas the Night Before Christmas…in our shop (it’s a parody)

A Caricatured Christmas Classic, this spoof has been brought to you by Koss Industrial, Inc.

‘Twas the night before Christmas, when all through our shop

Not a machine was stirring, not even a mop;

The tools were waiting on their benches with care,

In hopes that our fabricators soon would be there;

 

Stocked items were nestled all snug on their shelves,

While visions of installation & servicing danced in their heads;

Engineering and Sales, and I in my cap,

Lay down in our homes for a long winter’s nap,

 

When from the security system there arose such a clatter,

I sprang to my smartphone to see what was the matter.

Away to the shop I flew like a flash,

Grabbing my car keys and candy from my stash.

 

The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow

Gave the lustre of mid-day to our shop’s shipping door,

When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,

But a semi-sized sleigh, led by eight brawny reindeer,

 

With a little old driver, so lively and quick,

I knew in a moment it must be St. Nick.

More rapid than eagles his coursers they came,

And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name;

 

“Now, DASHER! now, DANCER! now, PRANCER and VIXEN!

On, COMET! on CUPID! on, DONNER and BLITZEN!

To the loading dock, quick! To unload it all!

Now dash away! dash away! dash away all!”

 

As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,

When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky,

So to our loading dock the coursers they flew,

With the sleigh full of tools (and St. Nicholas too).

 

And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the ground,

The prancing and pawing of each brawny hoof.

As I drew in my hand, and was turning around,

Through the shipping door St. Nicholas came with a bound.

 

He was dressed all in fur, from his head to his foot,

And his clothes were all tarnished with ashes and soot;

A bundle of tools he had flung on his back,

And he looked like a peddler just opening his pack.

 

His eyes — how they twinkled! His dimples how merry!

His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry!

His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,

And the beard of his chin was as white as the snow;

 

The stump of a pipe he held tight in his teeth,

And the smoke it encircled his head like a wreath;

He had a broad face and a little round belly,

That shook, when he laughed like a bowlful of jelly.

 

He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf,

And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself;

A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,

Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread;

 

He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,

Filling the fabricators’ benches with tools, he turned with a jerk,

And laying his finger aside of his nose,

And giving a nod, out the shop door he goes;

 

He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle,

And that semi-sleigh flew away like the down of a thistle.

But I heard him exclaim, ere he drove out of sight,

HAPPY CHRISTMAS TO ALL, AND TO ALL A GOOD-NIGHT!

A Caricatured Christmas Classic, this spoof has been brought to you by Koss Industrial, Inc.

Happy Holidays, and remember our shop is closed Christmas Day (12/25) and New Year’s Day (1/1)!